The Mistral City Genderbent Universes Dilemma
by MrLRocks78
Summary: Sequel to the Tekkit Genderbent Universes Dilemma. Xephos and Honeydew are visiting New Mistral for a bit of a holiday. Lalna , Sips and Sjin are accompanying them, and all five are excited to see how things are going in the mainland after the defeat of Israphel. But the glowstone portal from Tekkitopia isn't finished with them... Rated T for Yogscast.
1. Chapter 1: A Year After the Sands War

_Author's Note:_ _HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA! A SEQUEL! TO T.G.U.D! YAAAAAY! MORE FREAKING WRITING FOR MEEEEEE!_

Knight Peculiar smiled as he walked along the large open training fields. After the Sands War, and the defeat of Israphel, many cadet knights had signed up for becoming an elite defender of Minecraftia's mainland. The Icarian teenagers were armoured with iron chestplates, battle-worn but still worthy of use. Swords clashed and cries rang out from the trainers, one to each sparring pair.

Sidestepping swiftly to the right in order to avoid a slightly clumsy blow, Peculiar placed his hands behind his back as he paced, his mind drifting back to the past. Israphel's cruelty had no end, the pale-faced creeper-man having left KP to burn in the green lava for all eternity. It was by sheer luck that the night had saved himself. How he had gathered the strength to clamber out of that hellhole, he had no idea.

But the war was long gone, a mere prominent memory. New Mistral was now standing, surrounded by Swampy Bogbeard's moved forest. The Skylords had been re-established. All was well.

"Verigan!" called out a voice.

Peculiar turned to be greeted by the ever-beautiful face of Daisy Duke. Trailing behind her was a young man with messy brown hair and clever blue eyes. An iron sword swung at his side. This was Knight Jason, the newest knight in Icaria, and also the youngest, at just sixteen.

"Hello, Daisy," smiled Peculiar, embracing his fiance.

"Er, just wanted to say congratulations," said Jason sheepishly. "Um, yeah..."

"When did you hear the news, today?" said Daisy, laughing.

Jason ducked his head. "Ummm..."

Peculiar laughed, too. "Well, Jason, I hear that you're leading a spawner party tomorrow, hm?"

Jason's head jerked up nervously. "Umm, yeah. There's a spider spawner down near the mines, and it's becoming a bit of a bother. Er, we wouldn't need a full party if it weren't for the zombie spawner a few TNT explosions down."

Peculiar raised an eyebrow. "Really? Two spawners?"

"Down near the mines, yeah," said Jason awkwardly, shuffling his feet. "Ah, Arl's coming too, says he wants to take a gander at the loot."

Arl was the name of a young dwarf who had come from the ravaged Khaz Modan to live in Icaria, one of the few survivors of the dreaded Spider Attack. He was best friends with Jason, and they were practically inseparable. Their powerful friendship reminded KP of the two heroes, though he never said so.

"Just like a dwarf," giggled Daisy, "always in it for the money! Anyway, that's not why I came to talk to you, Veri."

"What is it?" Peculiar asked curiously.

"The heroes are apparently coming to visit!"

"WHAT?!" yelled Peculiar and Jason at the same time, causing a few sparrers to look up in confusion. After a few barks from their trainers, they directed their attention once more to their sparring. However, Peculiar and Jason weren't that easily put off.

"What do you MEAN, the _heroes_?!" demanded Peculiar.

"Exactly what I say," said Daisy, smirking a bit.

"The heroes?!" blubbered Jason. "Th-th-th-the HEROES heroes?!"

"I thought they were off in Tekkitopia on business of their own!" said KP.

"Well, they're coming back. Apparently, some of their friends have business in Mistral." Daisy shrugged.

"The heroes, as in Xephos and Honeydew the heroes?" gasped Jason frantically.

"Where did you get this information?" asked KP gently.

"They sent me a letter," said Daisy smugly, holding up a piece of paper.

"Ababababah..." stammered Jason, suddenly weak at the knees. "You DO mean the heroes of Minecraftia!"

"JASON!" yelled a voice suddenly. "Pull yourself together, man!"

Arl the dark-haired dwarf came striding up to him, swinging an iron pickaxe around with ease. He had a war helmet fashioned like the legendary Honeydew's, and was growing a beard to rival his, too. He was a bit older than Jason in human years, but talked like he was older than KP in human years. The dark-eyed dwarf stopped next to his best friend, coming up barely to the elbows.

The knight gestured frantically to his friend, evidently too shocked to speak.

"Hello, Arl," said KP.

"Have you heard?" asked Daisy eagerly. "The heroes of Minecraftia are coming to Mistral!"

Arl blinked his dark eyes for a few seconds. Then, he looked at Jason, who was still blubbering and stammering to himself. Jerking a thumb at him, he asked loudly, "Is that what's got ol' Jay all worked up for?"

Peculiar and Daisy nodded. Jason suddenly stumbled, leaning on his friend for support.

"The... the heroes..." he whimpered weakly.

Arl pushed his friend up. "Ugh! First off, Jay, I ain't no hatstand. Second off, ya got a spawner party to lead tomorrow! Chill out 'bout the heroes. I 'ear that they ain't no airships over in Tekkitopia, and anyways, the only transport 'part from trekkin' is by train. That'll take 'em at least two days. Ya got plenty o' time tah worry 'bout 'em comin' an' all."

Jason gulped a few breaths of air frantically. Then, he straightened a bit and muttered, "I guess so."

Arl clapped him on the back, hard, forcing all air out of the sixteen-year-old's lungs. "There's a good lad! Now les' leave the ol' grown-ups to their thing, eh? I hear that there's some mighty fine loot t' be found in those two dungeons o' yours, huh?"

Peculiar and Daisy watched them leave, both laughing quietly. Then, KP spoke.

"They're so much like Xephos and Honeydew," remarked the knight, hugging his fiance.

"Yeah, they are," she smiled back. "I wonder why Jason's so nervous, though."

Peculiar cleared his throat, suddenly extremely awkward. "Um..."

Daisy turned accusing green eyes on him. "What did you do, Veri?"

"Well, don't hate me for it. I know how much you dote on the lad - "

"I could never hate you!"

"Yes, I know. But I wasn't to know that the heroes were to be visiting, understand?"

"Yes, of course I do," said Daisy, confusion wrinkling her face a tad. "Why...?"

"Well, I might have scheduled for Skylord Markus and Skylord Katrina to pick him up to take him to Mistral. You know, knights have to know as much about Minecraftia's geography as possible, and he's never set foot outside Icaria in his life."

There was silence. Then, Daisy punched him on the arm in a friendly manner.

"Oh, Veri, you've practically given the poor kid a death sentance."

"I know," sighed Verigan Antioch the II. "I know."


	2. Chapter 2: Aboard the Train to Mistral

_Author's Note: Aaaaand switchin' back to our favourite Tekkitopians!_

"ThisissocoolIdon'tevenknowwhattoSAY!"

Xephos and Honeydew groaned as one and dug their heads into their pillows as the Tekkitopians that were "sleeping" nearby continued to chatter animatedly.

"I can't WAIT to see the mainland!" exclaimed Sjin. "I mean, I know I was born there, but I didn't stay there long enough to really REMEMBER anything, and now that I'm finally coming back...! Ohh, it's gonna be great!"

"What d'you mean, you 'didn't stay there long enough'?" demanded Sips, suddenly suspicious.

Lalna - or LividCoffee - suddenly butted in enthusiastically. "I hear that there's barely any magic OR science around!"

"And yet they've managed to thrive so much," added MintyMinute curiously.

"I wanna meet Swampy," piped up InTheLittleWood, also known as Martyn.

"He has magic," pointed out SoTotallyToby. "I thought you said there wasn't any magic in the mainland..."

"There is, you idiot," said Martyn impatiently. "It's just not _much_."

"Oh," said Toby sheepishly.

The Sapling King facepalmed and sighed at the same time.

Xephos looked up as a soft voice drifted into his ears. "Um, Xephos?"

"Hm?" he said tiredly. "What do you wa- oh, Lomadia!"

The spaceman's normally-pale face flushed tomato-red as he saw the kind eyes of Lomadia the owl caretaker next to him.

There was a slight creaking noise as Lomadia sat down on Xephos' bed. "I can't wait for the mainland! Can you?"

Xephos shook his head, twitching his mouth into an awkward half-smile.

"I'll be happy to get off this Notchforsaken train if it means getting away from these crazy insomniac Tekkitopians..." muttered Honeydew. He seemed to think that he was being quiet and sneaky, but in reality he had nearly screamed it in his frustration.

The Tekkitopians laughed loudly. Honeydew's bearded head popped out from his blankets, glaring accusingly at everyone laughing.

"So," said Nilesy as he adjusted his glasses, "where are we going first?"

Sjin immediately pulled out a map of the mainland. Opening it with a flourish, he cleared his throat dramatically. His clever blue eyes darted around, skimming over the map in a fraction of a second. Then, he declared, "Looks like we're headed for Mistral City first off!"

There was an exclamation of oohs and aahs, accompanied by a lot of discussion.

"Is it true that the spires glitter like diamonds?" asked Minty happily.

"Diamonds reflect," corrected Lalna.

"I want to see a Skylord!" exclaimed Toby.

Martyn shuddered. "Why in Notch's name would you want to fly in a ship? Ships are supposed to go on water."

"There are shiplords, too," piped up Sjin.

Sips looked at Honeydew. "Is that where you get 'see ya later, shitlords' from?"

There was more laughter and hooting. Xephos and Honeydew gritted their teeth and just put their heads back on their pillows.

"Keep it down, guys," said Lomadia. "Even legendary heroes of Minecraftia need to sleep."

The Tekkitopians finally quitened down, acknowledging the need for sleep that currently held Xephos and Honeydew. After a few more minutes of excited muttering, the lamps switched off with a flicker and everyone's heads hit their pillows.

* * *

Jason halted the spawner party with an upheld hand, shushing them gently as he peered around the corner. He gestured for Arl to join him at the front. The dwarf pushed his way through the party smugly, holding his pickaxe aloft. Without any commands needed, the dark-haired dwarven lad knocked out a single block of cobblestone. Peering through the peephole, Jason nearly stumbled backwards in alarm as he saw the glaring red eyes of a spider.

"Son of a gun," he muttered, beheading it with a flick of his wrist.

"Good job," commented Arl approvingly.

"Thanks," replied Jason, his cheeks tinging pink at the praise.

"How are we going about this?" asked Knight Gerald, a tall sandy-haired man in his late twenties.

Jason thought for a bit, peering through the hole and quickly calculating the size of the dungeon. Then, he replied.

"Arl, Derrick, Carson and I'll go around the dungeon, and mine out door-sized holes at one-block intervals. Then we can pick out the spiders inside. I'll get Luke and Darrel to slip in and disable it with torches, and Arl can take out the spawner."

Gerald nodded, approving of the plan. "What about scouts?"

"Pete and Sam can be scouts, one at each end," replied Jason.

"D'we go now?" asked Pete, a half-Tiki Islander with a rough dwarf-like voice.

Jason held up his hand again. "Hang on..."

* * *

"We're back!" crowed Arl happily.

Derrick and Carson were poking the raging spiders through the holes that they had knocked out. Seeing as the spiders were far too wide for the skinny gaps, all they could really do was spit and hiss.

"This was an awesome idea!" chortled Derrick, as he slashed at a spider and slew it.

"It WAS well thought-out," approved Gerald.

"Alright," declared Jason, clapping his hands together. "Let's take out this spawner. Luke, Darrel, torches ready?"

Luke and Darrel nodded from either side of the spawner, their forms just visible through the slim holes.

"Okay..." said Jason, holding up his sword, "GO!"

The spawner party charged, slashing at bulging arachnid bodies, kicking spider eyes out of their way. In a few seconds, the spiders had been exterminated. Jason yelled a command, and Luke and Darrel lurched forwards, practically throwing down torches.

Soon, the dungeon was fully lit up. Arl stepped forwards and swung his pickaxe. After a few seconds, the spawner disappeared in a tiny wisp of flame.

"Yesss!"

"Alright!"

High-fives and fist bumps were exchanged all around. However, Jason stopped them with his next words.

"Guys, we've still got the zombie spawner to take care of," he said. "Carson, Pete, you patch this place up and throw some torches down. Can we trust you to meet us down the cave? We'll put torches."

Pete and Carson nodded and saluted mockingly.

"Yes, sir!" snorted Carson.


	3. Chapter 3: New and Improved Terrorvale

_Author's Note: Stiiiiiill here with our favourite Tekkitopians!  
_  
"We have a bit of a walk ahead of us," said Xephos, as he led the other nine of the party through the forest. "I'm sure that there's a path nearby..."

"Like this one over here?" came Toby's voice from behind.

They quickly hurried back, and soon found the path that Xephos had been talking about. The eight Tekkitopians began strolling along it, chatting animatedly, but Xephos and Honeydew lingered back, looking in the opposite direction.

"Remember this, Xeph?" asked Honeydew, smiling as the memories came back. "When we were newbies to this crazy place, and we found that weird lava course..."

"...And the Survival Island," added Xephos, "and the Yogcave..."

The two heroes of Minecraftia were silent for a while, as the memories began stewing. They smiled at each other, remembering...

"**OI! ARE YOU GONNA BE OUR GUIDE OR WHAT?!**"

The moment was broken by Sips' angry voice slicing through the air like a knife through melting butter. The heroes burst out laughing and hurried to the front to lead their friends onwards.

The walk lasted barely a few minutes when they came across Terrorvale. There was an assortment of exclamations, not least of which was Xephos'.

"Wow!" he exclaimed. "Terrorvale's certainly been worked on."

It had been: hard. The bar had been extended, there were more houses and shops, the blacksmith's was much bigger, and the mines had been safely sealed up. As they approached the hamlet-extended-into-a-village, someone came rushing out of the bar to greet them.

He was in his early twenties, with messy brown hair and clever blue eyes. He wore a white stained apron over rough leather clothes, and seemed very happy indeed to see them.

"HAH!" he crowed, as he came to meet them. "So the rumours were true! And here I was, thinking how overactive everyone's imagination was!"

The man cleared his throat, then held out a calloused hand. "Sorry for not introducing myself, heroes. The name's Jeremy, but everyone calls me Jerry. I'm the bartender of Terrorvale!"

"This place really has had quite the polishing up since the war, huh?" remarked Xephos, as Jerry led them through Terrorvale.

"JAFFAS!" bellowed Honeydew suddenly, his eyes glinting. He barrelled into the nearby bar: the Jolly Skeleton.

"I thought that it was called the Skeletal Arms," said Minty, frowning.

"Wow," said Martyn disbelievingly. "Someone did their research, alright!"

"The Skeletal Arms was burned down in the war," explained Jerry, leading them inside after the dwarf.

The bar had been improved greatly. A crackling fire, an extra story or two, friendly paintings on the wall and additional drinks were only some of the imrpovements made to it. Minty began discussing with Jerry about selling some Tekkitopian ale, Toby started begging for Martyn to lend him money to buy something, and Sjin, Nilesy and Lalna wandered upstairs.

"Can we check out the rest of Terrorvale, Jerry?" asked Lomadia interestedly.

Jerry chuckled and bowed. "Of course, lovely lady!"

Laughing, not giggling, Lomadia walked outside happily. Xephos looked in Honeydew's direction, but the dwarf was busy ordering about fifty-million jaffa cakes to stuff his face with. Sighing and face-palming, the spaceman followed the owl caretaker and the bartender out into the mainland sunshine.

Terrorvale was as new as its inhabitants. Everywhere he turned, Xephos saw unfamiliar buildings, and unfamiliar faces. This wasn't to say that they weren't kind. No, they were extremely friendly, offering mainland gifts like cookies. The familiar taste of cookie in Xephos' mouth brought back a fresh barrage of memories.

Jerry was very friendly. He introduced them to absolutely everyone in Terrorvale.

"I'd show you my younger bro, but he's away in Icaria," grinned Jerry.

"Who's your younger bro?" asked Lomadia interestedly.

"His name's Jason. He's the youngest knight in Minecraftia since Verigan Antioch himself!"

"Really?" asked Xephos. "Must be good, huh?"

"He's a lot like you, apparently," added Jerry.

Lomadia smiled at the spaceman. "Xephos is the complete OPPOSITE of a courageous, dashing knight..."

"Shut up," snapped Xephos, but he was smiling.

Jerry smirked and nudged the hero. "She your lady?"

Xephos simply folded his arms and looked stubborn.

"Well, no, he's like you just because he's got a dwarf for a best friend," continued Jerry, as Lomadia laughed her head off. "And you're both foreigners. Jase was born in the Modlands, while mum and dad were on holiday. I was at home, looking after the house and stuff."

The bartender paused, then asked, "Have you ever been to the Modlands, hero?"

* * *

He hated those stupid stupid scientists.

Was it enough that science had taken the lives of his parents? Was it enough that he had been cursed, horribly cursed, by those filthy, slimy Endermen?

No. No, because they had taken Zoeya.

Zoeya... she had betrayed him, anyway. She had been dabbling in science from the start. Even Teep had drifted away from him.

_Lalna... Sjin..._

His two best childhood friends. And his two greatest arch-enemies.

Well, there was only one course of action. All his friends had abandoned him. Ravs, maybe, he was still okay. And Nilesy, too. Lomadia, as well. But but but... of course his greatest, bestest, so-called FRIENDS had turned their back.

Not that goggle-wearer, though. He had watched... watched as he placed the nukes and activated the forcefield and hooked up his science malarky.

Yes... the scientist would be the first to suffer his wrath. And then the architect. But first he needed allies. Allies? Oh, who was he kidding. They would be nothing but _distractions_. What he needed was _power,_ pure interdimensional power.

He giggled, almost sounding like that idiotic, accursed mad scientist, as he activated his precious precious Destruction Catalyst and cast it aside. The lopsided portal glimmered at him, cold and black and beautiful.

Here... here would his streak of destruction start. It would start with that damned parallel dimension.

Rythian the Enderborn stepped through.


	4. Chapter 4: Meanwhile, at Skyhold

_Author's Note: So hi. CHECK OUT MY NEW DEVIANTART ACCOUNT. I have all this stuff up there anyway, but I got a few pics of ponies (most with bases used) and yeah. Ummm... arrr and arrr?_

New Mistral was just as the name implied: new. Ever since Jock Fireblast, the infamous pyromaniac pirate, had burned down the city, many people had frowned upon the falsely-accused Skylord Lysander. But, once Israphel had been slain, Lysander's name had been officially cleared (the heroes' word was really more than enough for most people at any rate). In fact, there were many new changes done to Minecraftia's mainland.

Skyhold had been extended (slightly), and there were new Skylord cadets and recruits coming in every two or three months. This meant that, for the newest head Skylord, they were bombarded with paperwork almost every week.

This lucky person was Skylord Lysander himself.

The blue-clad Skylord sighed to himself as he signed the final cadet transport form with a flourish. Placing it on the very top of the considerate pile of paperwork, files and forms, Lysander collapsed on to his chair and yawned hugely.

He hadn't been getting much sleep lately, insisting on staying at work to finish the mountains of paperwork always waiting for him. Skylord Jasper, his greatest annoyance and greatest love, kept trying to drag (occasionally literally) the head Skylord from his desk, but Lysander was not easily swayed.

He also had a very strong grip on things like desks.

There came a knock on his door. "Umm... Lysander?"

A head popped into the small, plain office. It was Skylord Evans, a white-blonde, blue-eyed young man, in charge of Skyhold's food. He was very shy, and dressed in sunflower-yellow.

"Umm... a note came for you," he said, in his small, quiet voice.

The sleep-deprived Lysander managed a strained smile. "Bring it in, then."

Evans stepped into the office and handed the head Skylord a note. It wasn't printed on paper; rather, it was on yellow parchment that had the air of being stashed somewhere and forgotten. Lysander could have sworn he could smell jaffa cakes.

As Evans stepped quietly out of the office, unnoticed, Lysander read the messily-scrawled note with interest:

_Dear Lysander,_

_Hi, it's Xephos here. If it's alright with you, me and Honeydew are bringing over a few friends from Tekkitopia. They're in real need of a holiday, because half of them are CEOs of companies. If you could manage to get there, it'd be much appreciated._

_We're scheduled to reach Mistral City tomorrow, at dawn. KP mentioned something about a knight from Icaria, so if you could meet up with him, we'll find you guys and go from there._

_Xephos_

* * *

Lysander stepped gratefully out of his office into the dying rays of sun. He had had one of those rare days when paperwork seemed to be all that existed. Thankfully, he had finally gotten it all done, and began making eagerly towards his little dormitory-like cottage in Skyhold.

Each Skylord shared a dormitory-cottage with another, sometimes two others. Lysander was no exception. He shared his with Jasper's, though really it wasn't all that out of routine.

Knocking on the door, he waited two heartbeats before pushing it open and letting himself in. The evening chill was beginning to set in (Skyhold was naturally cold), and he moved gratefully into the warmth.

Jasper was cooking. He always cooked. Lysander had tried his hand at cooking once or twice, and the pan had melted to a drinkable substance.

"Hello, dear!" sang the ruby-clad Skylord, as Lysander entered the kitchen. It was the envy of Skyhold, their kitchen. No-one else had a kitchen.

"What're we having?" asked Lysander tiredly, sitting down.

"Food," replied Jasper smugly, placing said food down in the middle of the table. It was actually some steak, beautifully prepared with spices and vegetables and a tub of gravy and all that delicious foodstuff.

"Swell," sighed Lysander, cutting himself a portion and tucking in.

There wasn't much talking after a while. Lysander was eating ravenously (paperwork makes you hungry), and Jasper was busy humming rather than eating the spectacular meal. When the mute-blue Skylord was finished, Jasper was the first to speak.

"How was your day?" he asked.

Lysander raised an eyebrow. "Do you really care?"

Jasper simply shrugged. "I'm supposed to, aren't I? And, in my experience, the closest thing you can get to really caring WITHOUT caring is to PRETEND you care. So I'll ask again... _how was your day_?"

A pair of hazel eyes glared at a pair of grey ones. After a time, however, Lysander sighed and answered, "Fine."

"Maybe I should rephrase," replied Jasper smoothly. "What did you do today?"

"One word: paperwork," muttered Lysander, taking a swig of water.

"Deary me," sighed Jasper, patting his lover. "Again?"

"Mmhmm."

"I'm guessing being head Skylord isn't all it's cracked up to be."

"Mmhmm."

"Did Evans give you that letter?"

"Mmhmm."

"Who was it from?"

"Xephos."

"Oh, really?"

"Mmhmm."

"How was he?"

"_Really,_ Jasper!" exclaimed Lysander suddenly, losing patience. "How in the name of Notch was I supposed to know of his wellbeing? Did you expect that he would have written to me simply to tell me that he was okay? _Really_? I am not psychic, I cannot know of his wellbeing in any way, or at least until he visits Mistral. So, please Jasper, stop asking me petty questions!"

There was silence. Lysander was breathing hard, as if he had run a marathon. Then, stiffly, Jasper responded, "All right then, Lysander."

The head Skylord let out a breath that seemed to sap all of his anger. "Sorry, Jasper. Stress. I... um, I had no right to snap at you. It was my fault. Sorry."

Skylord Jasper stared at Lysander for a long time. In the silence that followed, Lysander felt awkward, eventually thinking that Jasper wouldn't forgive him, when...

"Don't be ridiculous, dear!"

Lysander threw his plate at him.


	5. Chapter 5: Off to Mistral

_Author's Note: If I had a superpower, it would be to change things into chickens. And I would use a magical vuvuzela._

"Are you sure you'll be fine?" asked Jerry nervously.

Xephos smiled reassuredly. "Sure we will! Nothing out there that we can't handle."

Jerry smiled as well. "Yeah, I guess..."

The rest of the Tekkitopians were busy getting prepared. Really, they had already brought the necessities on board the train with them, so there was no need for much else. Honeydew and Nilesy were talking intensely about something, but no-one could be bothered to find out what. In the end, it was Minty who inquired into it.

"We're like an old-fashioned raiding party," guffawed Honeydew. "Ye olde goone squad, eh?"

Nilesy chuckled. "Heh, we're like a big happy family!"

"Seldom happy when it comes to those two," muttered Honeydew, jerking his thumb at Sjin and Lalna, who - despite being near to each other - were pointedly ignoring one another.

"We're like a club," continued Nilesy, his eyes growing wider as he thought of the possibilities.

"A club... we need a name!" exclaimed Honeydew excitedly. "How about... 'Honeydew, Dwarf of Khaz Modan, and a Bunch of Other Guys'?"

"Or... 'The Great and Powerful Nilesy and Co.'!"

"Try something a bit less self-centred," offered Minty.

The other two looked at her, slightly startled, then resumed pondering a name.

"Umm... 'The Jaffa Pigus'?" offered Honeydew.

"Err... 'Nilesy and Honeydew and Lomadia and Xephos and Martyn and Toby and Minty and Sips and Sjin and Lalna'?"

Minty simply sighed and facepalmed. "Ugh... look, let ME come up with a name."

Both dwarf and poolman watched the bartender think for a bit. Then, slowly, Minty said to Honeydew, "You said something about a goon squad?"

"'Ye olde goone squad,'" repeated Honeydew.

"It doesn't really have that ring to it..." mused Nilesy.

Minty thought some more. Then, she said, "What about the Yogscast?"

Honeydew and Nilesy looked at each other.

"Where'd you get THAT from?" demanded the dwarf.

Minty shrugged. "Y'know, ye olde goone squad, _yogs_... just had to put something at the end. Wasn't really hard."

The other two looked at each other, evidently pondering the name. Then, Honeydew announced loudly to the other Tekkitopians, "WE ARE NOW OFFICIALLY KNOWN AS THE YOGSCAST!"

There was a lot of jumping and surprise and general looking around, when people weren't laughing. Honeydew let a satisfied smile settle across his face.

"So," said Xephos, coming over and grinning, to the surprise of all, "the Yogscast, huh?"

* * *

The newly-dubbed Yogscast were on a trek to New Mistral. They encountered little issues, being greeted by passersby enthusiastically. It wasn't until they reached the newly-sprouted forest surrounding New Mistral that trouble began.

"What the heck?!" declared Honeydew, nudging a nearby tree.

"This forest wasn't here the last time we were visiting," murmured Xephos.

Martyn looked to a nearby tree, and took hold of the branch. Everyone froze to watch him as his eyes closed and he murmured something. After a few minutes of tense silence, the Sapling King looked up.

"This forest was grown by magic," he announced, looking somewhat grim. "Magic of someone who is closely related to the earth."

"Someone of your kingdom?" asked Lomadia interestedly.

Martyn looked thoughtful. "No. But one with equal, rivalling power."

Toby blinked at the Sapling King. "Since when did you get so deep and feeling?"

"Well, we ain't gonna accomplish nothing by just standing around like idiots," declared Sips, stepping into the forest.

Martyn yelled for Sips to stop, but the CEO had already entered the forest. There was a brief, blinding flash of green light emitting from the forest's heart, then nothing more.

"Wha... what the heck was that?!" demanded Sips, trying to step back out of the forest. But he was stymied by an invisible, seemingly unpenetrable forcefield. Yelling in shock, Sips whirled around and began hammering on the invisible shield.

Soon, the rest of them had rushed to the dirt trader's aid. There was a lot of pushing and jostling, and soon Minty, Sjin, Nilesy and Toby were also inside the forest. Xephos raised his voice to a shout and commanded them to shut the heck up.

"I TOLD you not to go in there!" raged Martyn angrily. "And whaddaya do?! You get yourself stuck in there, and we can't get through to you guys without getting stuck ourselves! We've lost the majority of our group because of petty idiocy!"

"Shut up, Martyn!" snapped Sips hotly.

"Let's not fight..." pleaded Sjin.

"OKAY, GUYS, SHUT IT!" bellowed Honeydew suddenly. Everyone looked, surprised, at the dwarf, who then stepped back as a way of inviting Xephos to talk.

"Er... thanks, pal," said Xephos awkwardly.

Clapping Xephos on the back, suddenly jolly again, Honeydew replied, "Don't mention it!"

Taking a deep breath, Xephos faced the Tekkitopians, the newly-dubbed Yogscast. "Okay. I guess the first thing to do is... well, you guys are a pretty formidable force on your own, right?"

Nervously, Xephos held his breath. But the rest of the Yogscast nodded, all of them agreeing without question. It was true, the trapped five in the forest were quite frankly a deadly combination to any monster. Well, actually it was essentially Sips and Sjin. Minty would be a good healer, Toby was good with his eyes, and Nilesy... well, there had to be SOMEONE to fill the "damsel in distress" role.

"Okay," said Xephos. "I guess the only thing left to do is to let you guys go on to Mistral. If you follow the path, you should be able to find the place easily."

"That is if there aren't any other tricks lying around," piped up Lomadia.

"Indeed," acknowledged Xephos, nodding. "So... you guys'll be okay?"

The five trapped in the forest nodded determinedly.

Xephos took another deep breath. He hated sending his friends into danger, but there was nothing else he could do.

"Alright then," he said with a mock smile. "Off to Mistral?"

Toby nodded. "Yup. Off to Mistral!"


	6. Chapter 6: The Deep Dark Hole

_Author's Note: They're in trouuuuble!_

Sips groaned and slashed his way through the vegetation with his axe. Toby had been sent out forwards to scout the path out, leaving just him and the other three.

Of course, that dumb-dumb Nilesy was whining like no tomorrow.

"And this forest is so forest-y and I don't LIKE forest-y forests and I wanna get back to society and I'm hungry and I don't have anything to defend myself with and I don't like forests that much and I'm hungryyy..."

"No wonder you killed him," muttered Minty to Sjin.

"I could try again," offered Sjin, reaching for his mining laser and mock-pointing it at Nilesy.

"Heyy!" exclaimed the poolman, starting as he saw the barrel being pointed at his head. "Okay, okay, I'll shut up!"

Sjin and Minty laughed, and even Sips gave a grudging smile.

Suddenly, Toby dropped down from the trees.

"AAAH!" yelled Nilesy in shock, tumbling into Sips. Swearing, Sips tried to push Nilesy off, but they both got tangled up and fell into a ditch.

"Don't DO that!" stammered the poolman, while Sips cursed Nilesy with several different swear words and profanities.

"Sorry," said Toby, not sounding sorry at all. Turning to Sjin and Minty, he said, "There's something you might wanna see. It's just up ahead..."

The other two looked at each other worriedly, then Sjin turned to Toby. "Show us the way."

Toby nodded and climbed swiftly back into the trees before setting off towards Mistral. Sjin and Minty followed quickly, leaving Sips and Nilesy in the ditch.

"Wha - oi!" bellowed Sips angrily, pushing Nilesy off him with a thump. "C'mere, you jokers!"

"Wait for us!" wailed Nilesy, as Sips clambered to his feet and ran after the others.

* * *

"Down there," hissed Toby, pointing down into the very dark, very deep, hole.

Sips and Nilesy, who had just caught up and were panting hard, peered into the hole.

"Doesn't... look... so... bad..." heaved Sips with an effort.

"We'll explore it some other time," said Minty. "Do you know which way to Mistral?"

Toby just shook his head. "I do, but that's the thing. The damn hole isn't letting us outta here!"

"Don't be ridiculous, Toby!" scoffed Sjin. "How can a hole stop us from going to Mistral?"

"Try getting out of the clearing, then," challenged Toby.

Loftily, Sjin continued on the path. Once he was clear of the hole and the others, he began marching purposefully to Mistral. After a few minutes of silent walking, he saw a clearing opening up.

It was the same one.

"What the - " stammered Sjin. He then tried to continue on his path, but found that it irreversibly looped back, no matter how he walked his route.

"Fiddlesticks!" uttered the architect, as Toby folded his arms triumphantly. "There really IS no way out except back there."

Nilesy gulped as he looked down into the hole. "Umm... guys? Is this really the only way onwards?"

"Appears so," said Minty, as she drew her only weapon: a stone sword. "Are we going in there, then?"

"Looks like it," replied Sjin, taking out his mining laser and checking the charge.

Sips sighed and looked down into the hole. "Why can't anything be easy anymore?"

* * *

Nilesy, understandibly and predictably, was extremely nervous about going down into the hole, seeing as he had a bad experience with holes in the past. Therefore, he and Toby had offered to stay on the surface world as scouts.

"And while we're gone, you can try to find a way to Mistral," Sjin had said before they had descended into the dark depths.

Now, both Nilesy and Toby were on the surface, the former pacing frantically, the latter chilling out in the trees.

"You think they'll get hurt or... or lost, or something?" gulped Nilesy, as he glanced at Toby.

"Naw," said Toby. That was essentially the extent of their conversation.

Sighing, Nilesy looked down into the hole and prayed to Notch that it was a small one.

* * *

Of course, it wasn't.

Sjin led the way, having the largest supply of torches. Then came Minty, with Sips bringing up the rear.

As they trekked, they disrupted bats from the ceiling, and spent a good half an hour or so flapping at the things to get them out of their faces. Strangely, and slightly unnervingly, they encountered no monsters, save for a zombie that Minty quickly and easily dispatched.

"I'm huuuungry," whined Sips after a time.

"Don't you start," warned Minty threateningly. She had upgraded her sword into an iron one after stumbling on a pretty thick vein of the stuff.

Suddenly, Sjin threw out his arms.

"That was dramatic," said Sips coolly.

"Shut up," hissed Sjin. He then pointed to the distance, where they could make out a faint, golden light.

"What the..." whispered Sips. "The hell is that?!"

"Don't know," said Minty, "but there's only one way to find out, right?"

Sjin nodded and led the other two towards the golden light. They rounded a corner, and they all let out a collective gasp.

A large underground cavern had been hollowed out. The light they had seen was emitting from a strange glowstone construction, kind of like a portal. It was a boy symbol, with the tip of the arrow connecting with the bottom of a girl symbol. Both had Nether-portal stuff in their circle-square things. To the left was a chest which Sips peered into.

"There's flint and steel and a Destruction Catalyst in here," he whispered.

Sjin and Minty shot each other a look. It was plain what the options were: ignore the portal and try to find another way to Mistral, or go through the portal into... into what?

"Let's get Toby and Nilesy," said Sjin. "They might want to have a look at this."


	7. Chapter 7: Crazy Old Bugger

_Author's Note: Finally, I've gotten the motivation to post something! OH, and for any RiTZ fans, please  
_  
Nilesy kept trying to hide behind Sjin, thus annoying the architect to a certain extent.

"Seriously, Nilesy!" exclaimed Minty. "Grow a backbone, please!"

"I'm more of a useless blob of fear," stammered Nilesy.

Sips, meanwhile, was trying to keep Toby away from the Destruction Catalyst, which Toby kept trying to use on the portal.

"Just - one - try!" he begged, while trying to dodge around the noticeably larger Sips.

"Not - on - my - watch - ya - joker!" snapped back Sips, lunging for Toby as he danced around the dirt trader.

"What is that thing anyway?" whined Nilesy.

Sjin walked up to the portal; with difficulty, seeing as Sips and Toby were still chasing after each other around it, and Nilesy was clinging to his leg nervously.

"Oh Notch," he muttered. "Really?"

Turning back to Minty, he said, "This is the portal that brought us to that crazy genderbent dimension!"

"What, the one where girls are boys and boys are girls?" replied Minty curiously.

Sjin nodded. "The very same. It appears that some joker rebuilt it!"

"Didn't Lalna say that he was going to move it?" pointed out Nilesy.

"Yeah, but knowing him, he would probably move it underneath his castle or something," replied Sjin. "Definitely not... oh, I don't know... in an underground cave near New Mistral?!"

"Sooo... what do we do?" asked Minty. "Go through, or try to find another way?"

Sjin just shrugged. "Don't ask me, I'm just an architect."

Nilesy, tentatively and very surprisingly, put forth a suggestion. "How about we backtrack through the forest and tell the others, and we can decide from there?"

The architect and the bartender looked at each other, surprised. Then, Sjin nodded.

"Come on, Sips, Toby!" called Minty, looking over her shoulder at the other two as they departed.

* * *

"The WHAT?!"

Xephos looked from Sjin to Minty and back again. "Don't be ridiculous. The portal was moved underneath Castle Duncan, ask Lalna himself!"

Lalna nodded. "Yeah, I did."

"So how in the name of jaffery goodness did that portal get underneath New Mistral when no-one can even get into the darned forest?!" demanded Honeydew.

Sjin just shrugged. "Don't ask me, I'm just an architect."

Suddenly, Lomadia exclaimed and pointed upwards. "Guys! Look!"

The Yogscast looked up and exclaimed in various volumes of awe. The sun was suddenly and briefly blocked by the silhouette of a flying humanoid, who soon revealed himself to be an aged druid, with white hair and clad in green robes. In his right fist he held a stick, while the other one was being brandished at the Yogscast angrily.

"GET OUT OF MY FOREST!" he shrieked.

"Swampy Bogbeard!" exclaimed Xephos happily.

"Yess!" shouted Honeydew, punching the air. "I knew you wouldn't let us down, ya crazy bastard!"

Swampy landed on the ground with a slight thump. Lalna looked in awe at the possibly senile old druid, with his slightly crossed eyes and his extended middle finger.

"Yoouu!" he shrieked, brandishing his stick at the heroes.

"I'd think he'd have at least a bit of respect for us," muttered Honeydew to Xephos. "You know, after the whole Israphel thing... a few jaffas wouldn't go amiss..."

Martyn looked up. His mouth fell open. To everyone's surprise, he uttered, very loudly, "YOU?!"

Swampy turned his crossed eyes onto the Sapling King. Recognition lit in his eyes.

"Ah!" he declared. "Young Sapling King! Been a while, eh?"

Toby looked at Martyn, confused. Leaning forward as much as the ever uncooperative forest edge allowed, he hissed, "What the heck is going on here?!"

"Swampy was the court wizard and druid in the Sapling Kingdom," explained Martyn. "Then he disappeared one day."

"Had to keep an eye on my younger brother, Fumblemore, if you know who I'm talking about," replied Swampy. Then he suddenly switched back to angry old man mode.

"OI! YOU! GET OUTTA MY FOREST!" he bellowed, whipping his stick around and nearly cuffing Lomadia around the head.

Sips rolled his eyes and yelled back, "WE WOULD IF WE COULD, YOU CRAZY OLD MOTHERTRUCKER!"

Minty groaned exasperatedly. Shoving the pale-faced dirt trader aside, she explained to Swampy, "Look, sir, we all know that you're the - ahem - boss of this forest. So we're assuming that you can turn this forcefield thingy off, right? For us? Please?"

The face Minty gave Swampy could have melted a brick wall. Unfortunately, Swampy had no heart - nor brick wall - to be melted.

"NO," he growled, and began to fly away.

"Waaait!" called Lalna desperately.

"SWAMPY C'MERE YA BUGGER," roared Honeydew.

The Yogscast watched Swampy fly off to the towering spires of New Mistral. Xephos sighed and shook his head.

"This is a disaster..."

* * *

Rythian looked around the jaffa factory. It was a good thing that the machines had somehow turned to sand. Although he wasn't to blame, it was definitely a magic user's doing. The thought of magic getting one over science made him smile.

He turned around and was greeted by the sight of a large portion of the floor made out of glass. Peering down into the floor it displayed, he saw heaping piles of sand.

As he looked closer, he started and stumbled backwards.

"No..." he hissed, his eyes glowing purple as he hardly dared to believe what he was seeing.

In the middle of the sand, heaping and spilling out along the floor, was... no... no, it couldn't be...

"No no no no no..."

Rythian backed away, his eyes flickering between blue and purple. Then, with an amazing effort of will, he wrenched his gaze away from the glass and ran, ran out of that accursed factory.

"This is all science's fault..." he whispered to himself. "And now Minecraftia is in terrible peril..."

Then he collided with someone with long blonde hair and clad in a lab coat.


	8. Chapter 8: The Scientist Woman

_Author's Note: SORRY AUTHOR'S NOTE DIDN'T WORK LAST TIME YEAH PLEASE CHECK OUT MY POLL AND VOTE YEAH SPOONS  
_  
Rythian's eyes widened as he took in what he was seeing.

A scientist. That was clear from the lab coat. Long blonde hair, stained with oil. Blue eyes. Goggles.

"What... the..."

Right before he was about to utter an unforgiveable swear word, the scientist clapped her gloved hands over her mouth.

"Oh! I... um, I'm so sorry, I didn't see you there..."

"Who are you?" blurted out Rythian. His eyes tingled ever so slightly, and he felt them slowly lapse back into a casual blue.

The scientist woman watched this process interestedly. "Oh... cool..."

She suddenly became aware of Rythian's presence. "Oh! I'm sorry, I just... wait a second..."

Rythian watched the scientist woman's brow furrow, then her eyes widen. He felt completely nonplussed. What the hell was going on...?

"Hello," she said again, stiffly, suddenly cautious of him. "Am I right in thinking that you are a mage?"

"Yes..." said Rythain uncertainly.

"And... do you have an apprentice?"

"Yes..."

"Who likes mushrooms? And a mute sharpshooter dinosaur who defends you from monsters?"

And then it hit him. This woman... she must be...

"Lalna's counterpart," hissed Rythian, his eyes flaring back into purple.

The counterpart suddenly seemed to understand, as well. Jumping back, she drew a strange mechanical glove and fitted it over her own. It reminded Rythian of Zoeya's injury. He felt sick.

"What do you expect to do with that, you filthy scientist?" taunted Rythian.

In answer, the counterpart levelled the hand at Rythian and began visibly charging it up.

"What the - "

A large laser collided with Rythian, causing him searing pain and propelling him slightly. Gagging a bit, he staggered to his feet, his already purple eyes glowing and filled with wrath.

"You... will... pay..." hissed the Enderborn, and launched at the counterpart.

His hand glowed with purple Endermen aura as he lashed out at the woman Lalna. She pivoted on her heel and shot three more lasers in quick succession. Rythian dodged the two with a quick pivot and deflected the last one with a brief purple forcefield. The laser rebounded off the magic and back at the scientist. It hit her, and she screamed.

"You bastard..." she managed to stammer. Then, she got to her feet with surprising agility and fired more lasers.

"Is that all your petty science toy can do?" Rythian taunted as he danced around.

Suddenly, he screwed up his mind in an instinctive response to himself. He felt a thousand needles pinprick him in less than a second, then he was standing behind the counterpart as a disgusting slurping or sucking noise echoed around the science facility, a few Enderman particles left in his trace.

Before the counterpart could comprehend what had happened, Rythian burned her back with a large bout of purple fire. Screaming, she fell to the floor, nearly dead.

Rythian loomed over the slowly dying scientist. Maybe he hadn't killed Lalna, but his counterpart was the next best thing. He drew his katar and aimed it at her throat, seeing the fear and hatred in her eyes.

The perfect moment.

But then she had to go and ruin it by pressing a button on her science toy and blipping away.

* * *

"So yeah, man, it was like a whole security thing, man, cuz there are these crazy Endermen spawning even more all of a sudden. I only agreed to the forcefield because Endermen, like, pick up natural blocks and move them, maaan. They totally defile the land!"

"I can see you haven't changed," muttered Martyn.

"But you don't know about the portal?" persisted Xephos.

Swampy shook his head and shrugged. "Sorry, spaceman man... man thing. Man. Dunno. All I can do is switch it on and off, maan. The forcefield, I mean, maaan."

"You aren't very literal, are you?" pointed out Sjin.

Swampy glared at him and began beating him with his stick.

"Ow! Oww! OW OW OW! Aaagh, okay, okay, I'm sorry!" yelped Sjin, cowering as he shielded his head and face with his arms.

"So," said Lomadia doggedly, "the portal. You don't know anything?"

"Didn't I just tell you, maaan?!" Swampy paused and amended, "Er... WOmaaan."

"What about your brother?" asked Nilesy. "You know, Fumblemore? Could he be behind this?"

Swampy scoffed. "Maybe he'd TRY to make it, man, but he'd totally wouldn't be able to make it, man. He'd totally explode it or something, maaan."

"But how did the portal get there in the first place?" demanded Honeydew.

To that, no-one could answer. The stout dwarf looked to each of his friends, then rolled his eyes.

"What about the enchanted clearing?" asked Xephos.

Swampy shrugged. "Still nothing, maaan."

Minty shook her head. "Well, the only course of action that I can see is to go through the portal and hope for the best."

"That doesn't sound like a good plan," said Lalna bluntly.

Honeydew, however, let a toothy smile break out over his face. "Well, it's the best chance we've got, so full steam ahead I say!"

Xephos smiled slightly at his friend's enthusiasm for adventure. Deep inside him, he felt the rekindling of the flame of his spirit as well. Tekkitopia may be a technologically and magically advanced portion of Minecraftia, but when you got extremely powerful, you never really got around to just trekking around and taking on a few baddies, maybe taking out a spawner or two and getting some old-fashioned loot in a dungeon.

"Alright, then," he said. "I'm all for Minty's plan."

Sips and Sjin looked at each other, then as one raised their weapons and grinned.

"This is gonna be freakin' fantastic," smirked Sips.

Lalna shrugged. "Well, might as well. It'll be nice to catch up with Talna, anyway."

"I'd like to see this alternate dimension," piped up Lomadia.

"Can we go, Martyn?" asked Toby eagerly. "Please please please please please?"

"Since when were you so pushy?" snapped Martyn, though he was smiling. "I guess we can go."

Nilesy looked from each of the Yogscast's faces like a cornered rabbit. Finally, he exclaimed, "Dammit! Peer pressure! Fine. Fine. We'll go."

"I won't, though," interrupted Swampy stubbornly. "I'm gonna look after the forest, man."

"Kay," said Xephos.

"Bye, Swampy!" chorused the Yogscast, at various times and at different enthusiasm levels. The druid just sniffed huffily, leapt into the air, bellowed, "Swampy... awaaaay!" and flew off until he was a speck.

Afterwards, no-one could say for sure, but they could all have sworn they heard him say, "Don't defile the land! Or I'll find you... and kill you!"


	9. Chapter 9: Into The Portal We Go

_Author's Note: Okay, I just want to tell you guys how much your reviews make me laugh! So many people are on the side of Rythian, too, so that always warrents hilarity. Okay, ON WITH THE SHOW! Story. SHOW STORY!  
_  
The lopsided, jet-black portal swirled with white matter before them. Nilesy made sure to stay near the back, barely listening to the rest of the Yogscast discussing their course of action once in the portal.

How in the name of Notch could they be so calm about this?! They were going into a freakin' alternate DIMENSION for Ender's sake!

Really. Like, really. What the heck was Lalna thinking when he made the darn thing?! How did they know that they wouldn't get trapped there, or lost there, or killed there, or hurt there, or something?

"Come on, Nilesy," muttered the poolman, "be a man... it's just a portal... just a Notch-damn portal..."

"Right," said Xephos, taking charge as per usual. "Everyone got supplies?"

There was a general murmur of assent as the Yogscast checked their pockets. Nilesy did so, too, and found half a stack of assorted foodstuffs. Even though he felt terrified, he nodded bravely along with everyone else.

"That's good, then," acknowledged the spaceman. "Alright, guys, this really isn't a big deal. We'll just go through, find a way back out and into Mistral, and we'll be fine."

"Riiiiight," said Nilesy disbelievingly, though he was so quiet no-one heard.

"Oh, man, Sips, this is gonna be great!" exclaimed Sjin enthusiastically, although Nilesy couldn't tell why he would be so happy about the whole damn thing.

Honeydew held up his pickaxe, and uttered, "Come, friends, and let us engage in the fun-time of adventure!"

Amongst cheering and laughter, the Yogscast piled into the genderbent portal. All of them except Nilesy. He was still nervous as all heck, and remained with his knees knocking, debating with himself about the portal.

Suddenly, Xephos' hand reached out and grabbed him by the tie.

"Man up, bitch!" came his faint voice, and Nilesy was pulled in.

* * *

Rythian closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When you were at a certain level of magic, being able to seen teleport points, or waypoints, was one of your skills, apart from seeing its usual white-beam form.

In his mind's eye, he saw a faint thin white line, somewhere in the distance. Concentrating his magic, the Enderborn's fists slowly clenched, and he felt his matter relocated to the white beam in a matter of nanoseconds.

Opening his Enderman eyes, Rythian saw quite an odd sight. There was an orchard of trees, very interestingly coloured trees, some overlapping with others and making strangely coloured trees.

To his left, there was a strange marble building that resembled a beehive. Turning around, Rythian saw a wooden hut propped up on sticks. Underneath and from inside it, he sensed the aura of young but strengthening magic.

In the distance, when Rythian turned back to his original position, he saw a distance giant tank, perched atop a volcano. He was forcefully reminded of Baby Jim, the little volcano dubbed by Zoeya, and he felt a completely unexpected pang of homesickness.

Shaking this off, Rythian raised his purple eyes to the rapidly darkening sky. It would be night soon, and monsters would begin spawning. Which was no problem for him, of course.

"Right," he muttered to himself. "First I've got to get an idea of their power..."

The Enderborn began walking around, breathing deeply upon passing the flamboyant trees. They had a nice smell, homely and welcoming, much unlike the overpowering scent he had been expecting from their colour.

"Wait... is that racist to trees?" Rythian thought about this for a minute then sighed and shrugged to himself. He didn't really know.

Looking around a bit more, Rythian deduced that the genderbent versions had probably rendezvoused somewhere, thanks to the warning the scientist woman had undoubtedly given her friends.

The Enderborn closed his eyes and, pinching the bridge of his nose, heaved a deep long sigh. Honestly, this was just uncalled for. Where the bloody Ender _were_ they?

Thinking a bit more to himself, Rythian began probing through the magical aura around the waypoint beam. The Jaffa Factory... no point in that. Site Bee... that was where he was. Wait... Castle Dani? If Castle Duncan was Lalna's name for his castle... then maybe...

Rythian shut his eyes as he teleported himself to his genderbent enemy's castle.

* * *

Honestly, who didn't love pools?

Nellsy had racked her brains more than once, and couldn't come up with a single person she didn't know who liked pools. Sure, Honeysuckle wasn't exactly the greatest swimmer, and Rythelle's Ender-disease thingy kind of took away her like of water, but apart from that everyone liked pools.

So why wasn't anyone buying anything?

Sighing, Nellsy looked around at the inside of her dirt-wood shack. Absent-mindedly, she murmured the name of her small little business under her breath, accompanied by a cheery greeting that no-one would hear.

"Welcome to Nellsy's Best and Greatest Number One Importer and Exporter of Really Good Pools and Pool Accessories..."

Really, normally Nellsy always liked to keep a positive attitude. But this wasn't normal. Sure, selling pools in the middle of the jungle wasn't exactly considered to be normal either, but then again the jungle was hot. And pools were made to cool people off, right?

The poolwoman sighed and pushed her glasses up. Punching the dirt block barring her way, Nellsy slipped out of her dirt shack. Replacing the block and yawning, she checked her inventory before nodding to herself. Food, torches, wood, a hastily crafted stone sword...

"I might as well go for a walk," she muttered to herself, turning to leave. "It's not like anything exciting is gonna happen while I'm out..."


	10. Chapter 10: Poolpeople

_Author's Note: Just a little headcanon: Nilesy's (or Nellsy's) Best and Greatest Number One Importer and Exporter of Really Good Pools and Pool Accessories is more like a badly-made house, not a one-block-wide shack.  
_  
Nellsy looked up at the sky and gulped. It was dark. Very dark. Dangerously dark. Nervously shooting a look behind her in case there was a creeper or some other ungodly denizen of the night stalking her, the poolwoman slowly drew her stone sword.

"I'd better get back to the pool shop," she muttered to herself, nervously.

Turning around, she began walking, at first with a forced calmness, but soon breaking into a run. Casting another frantic look behind her, the poolwoman gulped before picking up her pace. Her belly growled indignantly, but Nellsy ignored it, instead focusing all her efforts on getting back to her shop.

"Dammit dammit dammit," she hissed, her glasses and tie askew as she hastily side-stepped a zombie that lurched out at her from the shadows. Behind her, she was beginning to here the hissing of spiders and the twang of skeletal archer bows, but no telltale hissing yet.

Praying to Score that her luck would hold, Nellsy slashed out blindly with her sword at a particularly bulbous spider, which withdrew, shrieking angrily, green bloody oozing from its eyes.

Nellsy started to feel the toll her sprinting was taking, and was forced to slow down lest she tripped over her own feet. Scared out of her mind, she yelled hotly at some skeletons in a tree, deflecting their arrows with her sword, in an attempt to reduce her fear.

"BUGGER OFF!" she shrieked, before running headfirst into a tree.

Stumbling backwards, rubbing her head and swearing, Nellsy didn't realise that an all too familiar hissing noise was raring up behind her. Not until, of course, the damned creeper blew Nellsy and the tree up, propelling the poolwoman fifty feet forwards.

Before blacking out, Nellsy heard footsteps running up behind her, human or monster she did not know. All she did know was an aching pain, a searing pain, a lot of pain, even more pain, then blissful unconsciousness.

* * *

Nilesy opened his eyes. Had it worked? No. No it... well, kind of. It had kind of worked. Kind of.

He was still in a cave, but it was well-lit, and much bigger than the Mistral Forest cave. What really made Nilesy nearly jump back in alarm was that only he appeared to be in the cave.

Where the heck was the rest of the Yogscast?

Nervously, the poolman looked around. Yup, a cave alright. It appeared to be purposefully hollowed out, however, as if someone had stumbled across it and had decided that it would make the perfect storage spot for a giant lopsided interdimensional portal.

Notch, that was a weird sentence.

The poolman decided that exploring was the best course of action right now. Getting up and dusting himself off, Nilesy looked around for the exit. It wasn't hard to locate it, the said exit being right in front of him, but it was always good to rule out any other possibilites.

Gulping, Nilesy the poolman ventured out into a world familiar and yet unfamiliar to him.

* * *

It had been a while since Nilesy had started walking aimlessly around, punching wood and making basic tools. He felt slightly humiliated as he smashed his fist into the bark of the tree, but what could you do?

Looking around, he realised with a shock that it was getting dark. Shivering slightly, he began walking, where he did not know. Knocking on a tree as he passed, he muttered to himself, "Please let me find someone..."

Nilesy continued to walk aimlessly around, raising a wooden sword nervously. It was quiet tonight... _too quiet._

"Where are all the monsters...?" demanded Nilesy of thin air.

Of course, he got no answer. Squaring his shoulders, the poolman stalked on. However, he had not taken two steps before he heard it... a high-pitched female scream that sounded a lot like, "BUGGER OFF!"

Another person! Shrugging off his fear, Nilesy raised his sword and ran towards the sound of the voice.

Then he heard an explosion.

Emerging out of the cover of the trees, Nilesy registered four things in quick succession: the unconscious woman beneath a tree, the approaching mobs, the large crater in the ground, and the large amount of blood.

Nilesy reacted on pure instinct. The first zombie went down without knowing what hit it. The second, third and fourth were soon decapitated by a few slashes. Skeletons collapsed at the blade of Nilesy's wooden sword. Spiders hissed and spat, one of them missing an eye. Nilesy took the other eye, and beheaded the creature. He stabbed creepers in the back and ran away to kill more mobs before they could blow him up.

Pivoting on one foot, Nilesy felt his bloodstained sword, and realised that it was close to breaking. Swearing at the weakness of wooden tools, he rushed towards the briefly visible woman and hauled her up. Skirting around the crater with difficulty, he fought off the approaching mobs with one hand, the other propping the woman up.

Swearing a lot now, Nilesy turned and headed for the jungle. Hopefully, they'd have more shelter in there at least.

* * *

Nellsy groaned. She stirred, and felt a sharp pain in about every part of her body. Opening her eyes with difficulty, she saw that the world was blurry and swirling a bit. Panicked, she tried to sit up, but felt a fresh wave of pain course through her and fell back onto the bed she was lying on.

Her comprehension catching up with her senses, Nellsy groped to her side and found her glasses, which she slipped on. The world came into focus, and she saw that she was in her pool shop.

Sitting up - slowly this time - and looking around, she saw a few familiar things: the chest, the pane-free windows, the comforting wooden walls. She heard the soft crackling of torches, and breathed a sigh of relief.

Now... _how in Score's name had she gotten here_?


	11. Chapter 11: Message from BlessedMC

_Author's Note: A notice from BlessedMC: __I am notdead, and due to a lack of computer access, all of my stories are on hiatus, and also because of events that I learned of six minutes ago, Aquatic Evils is cancelled until I can edit the plot sufficiently to confirm to the event, then it shall join the others on hiatus mode. The event is that Adam and Dawn broke up and it made me real sadded and screwed up my plot because I want this to be somewhat realistic. D:_

She had ebony-black hair that was always a bit out of place. She always ran a hand through it, yanking out the knots and such, when she was nervous or awkward or bored or pretty much anything. She also wore glasses, black-rimmed rectangular ones like Nilesy's own. She also wore a fancy-yet-casual T-shirt, with a green striped tie, like Nilesy. She was a bit clumsy (Nilesy assumed he was too, then) and quite friendly.

All in all, Nellsy was fairly nice, in all aspects. If that was a bit weird, liking pretty much everything of your genderbent self, Nilesy didn't know. And, frankly, he didn't care.

The poolpeople got on really well. They both acknowledged the complicated structure of pools, and how a single tiny teeny accessory could change its outlook ten times over. They understood the different temperatures of pool water, and its impact on its popularity. They understood the various pool-making materials, and both agreed that marble was probably the best. They enjoyed debating pleasantly over the role lava played in poolmaking, but they both secretly agreed whole-heartedly with the other.

Of course, Nellsy was still bedridden. And, of course, this left a lot of teasing and prodding at each other with half-sharpened words to do.

As for the memory of the Yogscast, it never left Nilesy's head. In fact, after three days of tending to her and nursing her back to health, Nilesy immediately brought up the very subject. They had been harvesting sugar cane, and with their arms full of the stuff, they went back to Best and Greatest, and Nilesy talked of the Yogscast and the portal as they walked.

"So," said Nilesy, finishing up as the poolshop came into view, "I guess you understand why I really need to get to them."

Nellsy nodded, her face really serious and stuff. "I'll help you, if that's okay. There's not much to do around here..."

Nilesy was taken aback at Nellsy's sudden eagerness to help. "Um... wow... sure! So... d'you have any idea where we should start?"

* * *

The castle was exactly the same as Rythian remembered it: cold, unforgiving and glowing a cold and unforgiving blue. He hated it. Hated it so much.

The Enderborn-mage didn't directly approach it. Not only was it idiotic but it was also dangerous. Instead, he settled for locating one of the more clueless genderbent forms.

But who would be suitable for the job?

Hmmm... it would preferably be someone who trusted him. Someone who wasn't one to question. Someone... like... Ravs?

A grin spread over Rythian's concealed face as he straightened up and backed away. Seeing as it didn't appear that the places and their locations changed in this dimension, it would be EASY to find Cabertown.

Turning, the Enderborn mage walked gleefully away from his genderbent nemesis' castle, and towards his success.

* * *

Caberville was coming along spectacularly!

Ravess looked around at the villager citizens of Caberville gleefully, straightening her mayoral coat as she strode purposefully through the desert town. She nodded curtly yet in a friendly manner as villagers passed by, their bulbous noses that so resembled her one swinging slightly, protruding out of their hoods, their yellow eyes gleaming.

Supplies were coming in from the west or east or north or south or whatever. Ravess had no fear of assassination anymore, seeing as her golem bodyguard, Jeva, was in her prime.

"Hey there," she greeted a duo of passing villagers, who worked in the hospital. The left one, clad in an olive robe, nodded, while the violet-clad one ducked her head.

"Isn't this great, Jeva?" asked Ravess, once the villagers had passed. "Just struttin' around, no assassination attempts, not a care in the world... I'm gonna put Caberville on the map!"

Jeva just blinked.

"We'll need some supplies, though, in order to build a second Curved Caber. But don't worry, I'll get some villagers on it!"

Jeva blinked again.

"I mean, this place is just so - " continued Ravess. Suddenly, though, she stopped in her tracks. She had heard the familiar slurping-like sound of a teleporting Enderman...

"Jeva!" ordered Ravess, snapping her fingers quick-smart.

The golem nodded, and immediately got into bodyguard mode, scouting out the area but never drawing too far away from the mayor.

"Where is it..." muttered Ravess, turning around on the spot.

Then a voice made her jump out of her skin.

"Hello," said Rythian Enderborn, expert mage and alchemist.

* * *

"Okay, Nells, whadda we got?" asked Nilesy enthusiastically, clapping his hands together.

Peering into the chest, Nellsy said, "Pork, beef, some chicken, tons of wood, couple of torches, some stone, two swords, three pickaxes, an axe, and five portable pools."

Nilesy nodded, adjusting his glasses as he did so. "Perfect! That's all we need, right?"

In response, Nellsy tossed him one of the stone swords, grinning.

"Let's do this," she affirmed.

Raising his sword into the air dramatically, Nilesy said happily, "Yogscast, here we come!"

Looking at each other and beaming, the poolpeople turned and, striding out of the door, set off for adventure. The sun rose and fell many times, but they sustained few injuries. They decided to travel on a consistent northern passage, the direction the portal was facing. As they travelled, unbeknownst to them both, they got ever closer to the Yogscast, but were always just a bit too far behind.

Now, we will go back in time and see our old friends, the spaceman and the dwarf, and what shenanigans they're up to.


	12. Chapter 12: Memories

_Author's Note: Ahhh, good times! And good headcanons!  
_  
Xephos groaned as he felt the sunlight hit his face. Where was he? The last thing he remembered was pulling Nilesy into the portal...

Wincing as he started to push himself up into a sitting position, the spaceman looked around. It was chilly... then he realised that he was in a taiga biome. As soon as he came to this conclusion, the cold invaded his body, chilling him and making him shiver.

Forcing himself up, he deduced his surroundings, slapping at the pins and needles in his legs as his breath came out in misty clouds. Fishing around in his pockets, he was relieved to find the whole of his - slightly messy - inventory there, and drew his diamond sword, enjoying the weight of it in his hands.

Looking around, the spaceman decided to try to find the others. Narrowing his eyes so that they glowed a bright blue, he managed to make out the faint silhouette of the floating nameplate of someone, but just who it was Xephos did not know.

"Hello?" he called out, tentatively. No reply. "Friend?"

Still, nothing. Starting to get slightly unnerved, Xephos pulled out his compass, hoping against hope that it would work. Surprisingly, it did; in fact, it was pointing with cold certainty towards an icy coast.

A coast Xephos recognised as the starting point of his and Honeydew's adventure.

"Huh," he said, smiling as the memories came back. "Fancy that."

"Xephos?" came a familiar voice. Turning around, relief flooded through the spaceman as he saw Honeydew the dwarf standing there, leaning on his signature diamond pickaxe and bearing that familiar cheeky grin.

"Honeydew!" Xephos blurted out happily.

Saluting, Honeydew replied cheerfully, "Hey there, friend!"

Xephos jog-ran towards his friend's side and punched him on the shoulder in a friendly manner. "Where've you been, then?"

Honeydew shrugged. "Eh, y'know, killed an evil creeper tyrant, proved the innocence of the leader of the greatest aerial Minecraftian guards, got about five girlfriends... the usual."

Xephos laughed, more so at finding his friend than the things he said, but he laughed all the same.

"Where are we?" asked Honeydew.

"You don't remember this place?" asked Xephos disbelievingly.

Squinting a bit, Honeydew began turning around on the spot. When he had completed a full circle, his face finally lit up in recognition.

"This is our old spawn point!" he exclaimed happily. "And if I'm right..."

Suddenly, the dwarf ran off, following a path that they both knew. Both laughing and swearing and yelling, Xephos quickly ran after him.

"What the hell're you doing, Honey - " The spaceman's query was cut off as the ruined remains of the Yogcave greeted them. It was overrun with vines and mushrooms and scattered pieces of cobblestone. Dirt and debris lay over everything like the fine flour coating of a cake, and yet there was a certain grace to the ruins of their old home.

Xephos looked around, walking slowly, his mouth agape. Suddenly, he nearly ran into Honeydew, who was looking at what used to be the Yogcave, beaming.

"Memories," he said simply, waving a hand to indicate everything.

"Yeah," replied Xephos. "Remember when Lysander crashed into here?"

Chuckling, Honeydew added, "And when we had to steal the record from Jasper?"

"And we had to make that potion for KP?"

"And the Carnivale?"

"And the battle at the breach?"

"And when we had to bail Lysander out of the mansion?"

"And when Vitali killed all the skylords?"

"And that first time we saw Israphel?"

"Yeah," said Xephos, glad of the reminiscenes as he looked out again at their wrecked home. "That first fateful day."

Honeydew looked over at his taller friend, and as he did so he saw that Xephos' stance was... different, somehow. Taller? Not really. More... sure of himself. A leader. He grinned. Well, if Xephos looked more leader-ish, he _definitely _looked more heroic. And dwarfish. And attractive.

"So what now?" asked Xephos suddenly, looking worriedly down at Honeydew. "What do we do? Where do we go?"

"To Mistral, I guess," replied the dwarf, shrugging. He looked up at the sky, and felt his beard twitch. "Or..."

"Or what?"

"Or we could save the world."

The spaceman looked at the dwarf. "Again?"

Honeydew shrugged and brought out his diamond pickaxe. Swinging it over his shoulder, he winked. "By all means, why not?"

Xephos smiled. "To Mistral it is."

* * *

"Knightess Enigma!"

Verennia Antioch turned around, one hand straying instinctively to her sword's hilt. She relaxed it when she saw her fiance, Dendram Duke, jogging towards her, leading a nervous-looking young knightess. In fact, she was the youngest, at just sixteen.

"Hello, Den," smiled KE, hugging Dendram fondly. Withdrawing, she nodded and extended a hand to Knightess Joy, who gulped nervously and hastily clasped hands with the skillfull knightess.

"H-hello, Knightess Verennia..." she murmured, ducking her head so that her long brown hair swung in front of her.

"No need to be so shy," said Verennia kindly. "I hear you're leading a spawner party tomorrow?"

"Um... that's not important..." she murmured. "I just wanted to say... y'know... congratulations on... y'know..."

Dendram laughed loudly. "If you stay this quiet, Joy, you'll fade away quicker than a despawning bone!"

Joy bit her lip and ducked her head lower. "Sorry," she whispered.

"It's okay," replied KE. "Am I right in assuming that your dwarven friend will be joining you?"

"Yeah, Aij's helping us out," said Joy.

"Well, it's good that you'll be clearing out the old mines," remarked Dendam. "The heroines ARE due in a few days' time."

Birds flew, madly twittering, cows mooed lowly, pigs squealed and chickens clucked fretfully as both Verennia and Joy exclaimed, "WHAT?!"

Waving his hands vaguely, Dendam said soothingly, "Due in Mistral, so don't worry. Them and some Tekkitopian friends are coming to stay."

Joy whimpered, but Verennia laid a hand on her shoulder.

"It'll be fine," soothed the knightess. "You don't need to worry about it now. You can go find Aij and prepare for the spawner raid party tomorrow, understand? And that's an order!"

Gulping in a futile attempt to calm herself, Joy nodded hastily and scurried off. Once she was gone, the head knightess sighed.

"Dendam," she said, turning to her fiance, "what would you say if I told you that I asked Skylords Kerron and Melli to take Joy to Mistral in order to get her more accustomed to the rest of Minecraftia's geography?"

Dendam blinked. Then, he ran a hand through his hair.

"I wouldn't hate you," he said after a time, "but I'd be extremely worried. Especially if they're due to come in three days' time."

"Which they are."

Dendam swore.


	13. Chapter 13: A Spawner Party's Discovery

_Author's Note: I kind of meant for this chapter to be confusing as all hell.  
_  
"Good work, guys," said Jason enthusiastically, as the spawner party began to make their way back to Icaria. "We won't have any more trouble from those beasties."

The other men - and dwarf - cheered loudly. Derrick and Carson hammered their axes against their chestplates, and Gerald clapped Jason on the shoulder.

"And here I was thinking that you were a loser!" crowed Carson.

Pete and Arl hit Carson hard, and although his chestplate took most of the damage, he winced at the blows.

"Now now, Carson," said Gerald. "It's not knightly of one to look down upon one's fellow subjects."

"Aw, stop bein' such a hypocrate, Gerry," snorted Arl.

Gerald glared at the dwarf, but Jason's friend was oblivious to the evil eye he was receiving.

* * *

The party of nine continued walking. Lyra, the daughter of a farmer in Terrorvale, was arguing with Delta, eldest sister of three other sisters and two younger brothers, about the ethics of sharing.

"Sharing is caring," Lyra explained. "And we all have to make the most of everything."

"Well, do that by taking what you get," retorted Delta. "Besides, it's different being an only child. For you, you get everything. For me, I get near-nothing!"

"Maybe if you all shared what you had, you'd get something that everyone loves!"

"What, a giant mess in the living room?" sneered Delta. "Well, we would if we HAD enough stuff to make a mess!"

"You have no idea how easy your life is!" snapped Lyra. "Farmers actually have to WORK."

"And working class families with a size of eight have to work HARDER!"

* * *

Jason and Arl looked at each other exasperatedly, as behind them Luke and Darrel continued bickering, their voices slowly rising, echoing all around them in the dark caverns. Finally, Arl span around on his heel and bellowed, "SHUT UP!"

Immediately, the voices of the farmer's son and the working class man died down. Nervously, they looked at each other, then at the extremely annoyed dwarf.

"Let's all try to get along, okay?" asked Jason, gently. However, everyone heard the authority and firmness behind his sweet tone.

Bowing their heads, Luke and Darrel murmured things that sounded like "yes sir" and "sorry, sir".

Jason chuckled. "No need to call me 'sir', I'm not Knight Peculiar!"

"Well said, Jason!" approved Gerald, clapping him on the shoulder again.

* * *

Aij's black braids swinging, she sidled over to Joy and muttered in her ear, standing on tiptoes even as Joy lowered her head, "She tends to do that, doesn't she?"

Grimacing, Joy looked over to where Gretel was beginning to educate Penny and Celeste on proper food preparation in the wild, and rubbed her slightly red shoulder. "It's a habit of her's, I guess."

"A weird one, by all accounts." Stroking her growing beard, Aij added, "Then again, most knights and knightesses reckon that I'm weird."

"Well, you're the apprentice of the fiance of the head knightess," said Joy matter-of-factly. "Everyone thinks you're weird."

"Even you?" exclaimed Aij, with a fake affronted look on her face.

Joy laughed and shook her head in response to Aij's hilarious face. She made the best funny faces.

* * *

"Hey!" exclaimed Carson suddenly, coming to a halt and as such stopping Pete, Gerald and Luke in their tracks. Raising a hand, he pointed not ahead where the exit to the mine was, but to two blocks of gravel to the left.

"It's just gravel, Carson," said Pete dismissively, trying to slip past him.

Jason, however, went up to the gravel, intrigued. Getting out a wooden shovel, he soon cleared the slight blockage, revealing a cleverly-concealed one-by-two hallway, evidently made by human-dwarf-or-other-pickaxe-wielding-species hands.

"Well, hello!" whistled Arl, dashing to his friend's side.

"Should we risk it?" said Jason doubtfully, peering into the long, narrow, dark hallway. By any accounts, it was too dark for baddies to spawn, even if they still could, but he was nervous about it all the same.

"There might be loot," chorused Arl and Darrel.

* * *

"I agree with the dwarf," said Celeste, jogging forwards.

"All in favour of exploring the alternate pathway?" asked Gretel.

Everyone except Joy and Penny raised their hands. Sighing, Joy said, "We've been overruled, Penny, but I'm still not sure about it."

"I'll lead, then," said Aij determinedly, stumping forwards with a torch held upwards. "Anyone thinks otherwise?"

Naturally, no-one disagreed - openly - with the muscly lady-dwarf, so she smirked and ventured forth into the hallway.

* * *

The nine of them began to walk along the underground corridor. Jason kept feeling a sense of apprehension, but looking back - for he was last in line - he saw nothing. Gulping, he gripped his sword hilt and ploughed resolutely on.

Suddenly, Arl stopped. The abruptness of his action caused a domino effect, toppling everyone - save himself and Jason - head over heels.

Once they had all straightened up and dusted themselves off and ceased swearing, Arl pointed with his pickaxe at the extremely obvious stone pressure plate on the ground, before the apparent end of the corridor.

"Everyone back up," he said hoarsely.

The other eight did so, jostling and bumping into the walls and each other. Taking a few cautionary steps back, Arl threw a piece of cobblestone onto the plate.

The two blocks that had "ended" the hallway parted. Snatching the cobblestone up, Arl waited for a few seconds. When no danger presented itself, he led everyone warily inside.

What they saw made their jaws drop.

* * *

"What the HELL is that?!" demanded Delta.

It was a giant, black portal, with white swirling insides. There was a chest in the corner, which Lyra revealed to contain flint and steel. It was shaped like a male and female sign conjoined, and the end of the male sign's arrow and the end of the female sign's cross, near the bottom.

"It looks... like a portal," said Joy slowly. "For what, though, I have no idea."

Aij, as a dwarf naturally mistrustful of portals, drew back, but Gretel, Lyra, Delta, Celeste, Penny and Joy crept closer. They poked at it, unsure. They listened to the soft swirling of the portal-matter. Aij, growing bored, decided to walk around and search for secret rooms.

Joy looked to her left, and saw another pressure plate. Curious, she threw a stick onto it. Immediately, the entire left cave wall withdrew. Awe-inspired by the crazy use of pistons, the nine crept closer.

Outside, they saw the forest of New Mistral.


	14. Chapter 14: The Mistral Glitch

_Author's Note: Okay, quick headcanon: Rythian/Rythelle's bandanna muffles their voice whenever they are lying.  
_  
Ravess immediately raised her fists defensively. The nearby villagers scattered, and Jeva leapt to her aid, tense as a bowstring and ready to strike.

"Who the bloody hell are you?!" the bartender demanded, earning herself many nervous glances from the fleeing villagers.

The stranger assumed an affronted and slightly hurt look. "How rude. Is this how you treat all humble visitors to Cabertown?"

"Caber_ville_," corrected Ravess immediately. She wasn't sure if she liked this stranger or not. He had hair like her friend Rythelle, albeit cut short. He had purple glowing eyes like Rythelle, albeit darker in shade. And he had a bandanna tied around his mouth like Rythelle, albeit lighter in colour.

She gave his get-up a once-over. Just like Rythelle's, but stylised to the male gender. Interesting. And weird. Could he be some weird obsessive cult-like fan of her's? A stalker? Groupie?

"Who are you?" she repeated, lowering her fists slightly. If he was as friendly as Rythelle was, maybe Ravess would be able to get some questions out of him...

The stranger inclined his head slightly, the bandanna stretching to indicate that whatever was beneath it - mouth or otherwise - was smiling. "My name is Rythian Enderborn, expert mage and alchemist. And am I right in saying that you are the bartender of a certain local bar?"

Impressed, Ravess finally let her arms drop. "You've done your studying."

"Oh no, I'm merely aquaintanced with the local area," Rythian Enderborn gently corrected her. "But I'm not so aquaintanced with Caberville. May I ask for accommodation, humble and weary a traveller I am?"

Ravess' eyes gleamed at the prospect of getting the word of Caberville around. "Sure! We'll give you our best room... as long as you tell your friends. And enemies. And aquaintances."

Rythian Enderborn laughed, the action for some reason muffled by his bandanna even though it never impacted his speech. "Lead on!"

* * *

Such gullibity.

Quietly, Rythian laughed maniacally inside as Woman-Ravs - who he soon learned was called Ravess - showed him all around Caberville. How pathetic. She didn't even realise that he and his woman-version shared the same name! What idiocy.

Rythian went through his master plan as Ravess showed him meaningless buildings and he let his silver tongue take over, lying through his bandanna about how amazing they were and how he wished he had these where he came from and did you make this yourself? Idiots.

They were all idiots.

His plan was as follows: he would burn Caberville, burn it until there was nothing but ashes. Then he would interrogate Ravess. Torture her. Then when he had as much information on this world as he could get, he would kill her.

Obviously, this world's Ridgedog would be alerted to the death, but she would not know who he was. He would retreat over the border, into the Mainland, where no Tekkitopian demi-god, male or female, had power.

And then came phase two.

He wanted to throw his head back. To cackle and laugh and curse science. For soon magic would prevail. _He would win_. Finally.

After all.

This.

Waiting.

And blood would be shed. Oh glorious bloodshed. And _he _would be in the middle of it all. _He_ would be almighty.

The name of Enderborn would rise again.

* * *

"This is weird," said Jason, as the rest of the team fanned out. "Since when was there this entrance to Mistral Forest?"

Arl shrugged, but the rest of them were too busy gaping up at the sky. Curious, Jason looked up, too, when he saw that it was night. Black as night.

"Ah, shit," he swore.

Sure, there were no more monsters spawning in the black pits of darkness. But that didn't mean that all evil had been eradicated. In fact, he knew as well as every other person in the spawner party that there was an irregularly-placed spawner somewhere. It was a block below the surface, but because of its glitchy nature it occasionally spawned anything from zombies to Endermen on the surface.

It was called the Mistral Glitch. And it was deadly.

A bowstring twanged, and hit Pete through the neck. Choking on his own blood, he sank to his knees and soon died. A second arrow hit Carson in the heart, killing him instantly.

Derrick was ambushed by a spider from behind, who kicked away his sword, overwhelmed him and bit out his jugular vein. He collapsed to the floor, blood pooling around him.

Jason, Arl, Gerald, Luke and Darrel were left standing.

"Everyone, make a circle, backs to the middle!" roared Jason, decapitating an approaching zombie.

The Glitch was out of control. Monsters swarmed in, left, right and centre. Arl was the only one able to withstand the skeleton arrows and still live, and was soon resembling a pincushion. Gerald had been hit on the shoulder, but was still fighting valiantly. Their only comfort was that the Glitch didn't spawn creepers.

Soon Endermen were sent in to attack. This made fighting difficult, because it was hard to avoid the tall black creatures' gaze and fight at the same time. The Glitch would stop at sunrise, immediately destroying all the mobs it had spawned, but they couldn't go on forever. Darrel was beginning to feel the toll of hunger, and Luke had provoked an Enderman.

There was a scream, and Darrel fell, overwhelmed by a swarm of zombies. The remaining four scattered. Bad idea. Arl tripped over a dead zombie corpse that was slowly fading into nonexistance, and thus fell at the mercy of two spiders and a spider jockey.

Gerald was shot again, in the back, then in the chest, and in the groin. He screamed and fell, dying.

Arl slashed out with his axe, being the only other survivor after Jason. The young knight soon came to his aid, slashing and stabbing with the precision of a knight thrice his experience.

"Run!" screamed Jason, stabbing a zombie through the heart. "Back to the portal!"

Arl shook his head and let his axe come crashing down on a skeleton. "Friends don't leave each other!"

Suddenly, Jason looked upwards, his face streaked with blood and grime, and came face to face with the cold unforgiving gaze of an Enderman.


	15. Chapter 15: KP Finds Out What Went Down

_Author's Note: NO NO NO RYTHIAN IS NOT STAYING AS THE BAD GUY NO HE IS NOT YEESH FREAKIN CARNIVOROUS PIGS AND SHIZZ  
_  
"They're all dead..." groaned Verigan, collapsing into a chair and putting a hand to his forehead. "All of them..."

"Not all," said Daisy quietly. "Jason and Arl are still fine."

"Yes, but that's not the point!" exclaimed the head knight. "The point is that I let nearly an entire raiding party get killed... they're all dead because of my foolishness..."

There was a knock on the door.

"Come in," said Daisy.

Into KP's office walked Jason, who looked nervous beyond all measure; Arl, whose face was contorted in barely-suppressed rage; Skylord Lysander, whose face was a metaphorical brick wall; and two skylords who both Peculiar and Daisy had heard of, but didn't know personally.

One of the mystery skylords was a young woman, clad in pink with her goggles around her head and her long brown hair tied into a ponytail. The other was a burly muscly man, who filled nearly the whole doorway and was clad in orange, with a thick rough brown beard.

"May I introduce Skylords Katrina and Horus Sterring?" said Lysander, indicating these two now.

Katrina nodded and managed a bright smile, while her brother did the same behind her.

"Thank you, Lysander," said KP, a little curtly.

"I am dismissed," replied the head skylord immediately.

Looking up, confused, Daisy and Verigan opened their mouths to reply, but Lysander smoothly interrupted them.

"I have no role to play here, no strings to pull. And your tone of voice, coupled with the latest developments, suggest that I must go and prepare the Celaeno for take-off soon, seeing as I am sure you want to send Jason and Arl, along with Katrina and Horus, off to New Mistral - am I correct in my assumptions?"

In response, Verigan cracked a tiny smile and nodded. "I continuously underestimate you, Lysander. Yes, you're dismissed."

"Thank you, Sir Antioch," said Lysander formally, inclining his head and backing out.

"Jason, Arl, take a seat," said KP, directing his attention to these two. "Daisy, Katrina, Horus, I'll need your help."

Daisy moved to sit next to her betrothed, while Katrina and Horus attempted to blend into the background. Horus in particular failed quite spectacularly at this particular endeavour, and ended up looking like a very out-of-place boulder.

"Erm..." began Jason, then decided against saying whatever he was about to say and instead attempted to shrink himself, albeit accomplishing it much more than Horus.

KP managed to send Jason a smile, but it was kind of strangled and so ended up making him look like he had toothache.

Arl, on the other hand, clutched the handle of his axe to try and reassure himself that his friend would be fine.

"Jason - " began Verigan, but he was interrupted.

"It's okay, Knight Antioch," whispered Jason, his head ducked in shame. "I'll resign."

"WHAT?!"

The cry burst from Arl's mouth before he could stop. Angrily, he got up - which didn't really add to his diminuitive state - and stamped the butt of his axe on the floor.

"What do you MEAN, resign?!" bellowed Arl. "Antioch, if you let him resign, I'll stuff my axe up your - "

"Could you leave out... _that_... thing, dwarf?" requested Horus, with a slight shudder.

Katrina giggled. "Ah, brother, you're so - "

"Don't even DARE," snapped Horus, suddenly bad-tempered.

The other skylord raised her hands in mock-defense. "Oh, so the big guy's getting ticked off by the gentle, mellow young woman, now, eh?"

"Shaddup, Kat..." muttered Horus, crossing his muscly arms and beginning to sulk.

KP watched this with a detached expression that would have looked right at home on Skylord Lysander's face. "Jason, I refuse your resignation."

It was Arl's turn to sigh with relief, but Jason was suddenly beside himself with fury.

"Knight Antioch, you HAVE to let me resign!" he fumed. "It's because of me that all of those knights died... I made the wrong choice, and even you can see that my judgement was faulty! I let them die, and I could have avoided it if we had stayed on-track! I don't care that we found that giant portal, I - "

"Wait," interrupted KP, with one hand up and a curious look on his face. "What... portal?"

"That giant portal with those weird stick things on the circle-squares!" exclaimed Arl, waving his axe and nearly decapitating Katrina.

Verigan frowned. "Jason, I want to hear your story. Without interruptions," he added pointedly, looking at the dwarf.

Jason gulped and bit his lip. Arl gave him a thump on the back and an encouraging smile. Breathing deeply and giving a shaky grin in return, Jason began to tell his tale.

* * *

Outside, Skylord Lysander prowled the streets of Icaria. Admittedly, he wasn't doing it very well. Prowling was for shiplords. Skylords, on the other hand, did NOT prowl. Especially skylords like Lysander.

Lysander was, right now, looking up at the sky. Being a big city, Icaria's lights blocked out most of the stars. Lysander felt a pang inside of him, and he realised that he missed Skyhold. Well, then again, he always missed Skyhold. Unless he was standing on its ground.

The head skylord sighed. Apart from Skyhold and New Mistral, Lysander missed Skylord Jasper. He tended to do that lately; miss things. He felt lonely nearly all the time. Just a few weeks back, Lysander would have loved to (badly) prowl the streets of Icaria. Now, he missed home. And his lover. And his job. And his family.

Well, his family were dead. That was one less thing to worry about, at any rate.

Skylord Lysander sighed and looked at his feet. He was _bored_. Never would he admit it in front of anyone but himself, and maybe even Jasper. Skyhold wasn't boring. No, nothing was boring. Nothing except everything.

Another sigh. He did that almost as much as he missed things.

_I almost wish for another Israphel attack._

Lysander immediately regretted that thought.


End file.
